One Week And Counting…

by Joy Monger




I have officially been unemployed for one week.

I’m surprisingly mostly great so far (minus the part where I drank one glass of wine too many at my work going-away party and then came home, took my pants off in the living room and ate a hot dog while sobbing; that was just weird, but I’m hoping it was a one-time-deal).

I haven’t made any big decisions about my life yet, and so far I haven’t had any giant revelations.

But I have had lots of time to be quiet and think and it’s funny what has bubbled up:

1.  I am going to stop saying I’m “unemployed” and instead refer to it as my “career-change-a-palooza” or “seeking divine career intervention”. I’d say “life change” but that makes me sound like I am going through menopause. I’m also going to stop saying “I don’t have any money” or “I’m not making any money”  because then the universe won’t send me more money. But if we’re out together and I say “oh, no let me get the check, I am totally flush with cash”, it’s only because I am thinking positively and you can still pay for my wine.

2. I thought I would be afraid of the unknown of being unemployed. Turns out the thing I fear most is getting offered another office job. I want to work from home, or work from Mexico, or only work half the year, or work 12 hours a day because I’m so inspired, and write and create, and run and cook. I’m scared someone is going to offer me a really great office job and I’ll feel guilty if I decline it, and sad if I take it.

3. The dirty workout clothes in my hamper finally out number the business lady pants! Hooray for no more “business casual”!

4. I need a guru. Or a mentor. My own personal Oprah. I have no idea how to stop mid-stream and swim in another career direction. Who are the gutsy women who can show me the way?

5. Batteries…they’re weird, right? Also, what’s the deal with fax machines? You put paper in a machine and then it sends the message to another piece of paper OVER THE PHONE? That’s crazy. (I had to change the batteries in my mouse and that got me to thinking. It might also be a sign that I have too much free time.)

6. The universe is pretty fantastic. And it’s all connected. I’m certain it will take care of me if I just let it.